How Checkered Hippo and I saved the Universe for Democracy

By Film Noir Buff

Checkered Hippo is one of the few remaining items from a delightfully misspent youth. Won at an amusement park for accurately throwing balls at a target, I learned that I had good hand eye coordination.

However, at the time, my only reward for both range and accuracy was this tacky, brightly colored little fellow who clashed with the interior of my parents car.

How he has survived so long, I cannot tell you. I think because he made a good bean bag pillow or, more likely, because every superhero needs a trusty side kick.

What I can tell you is that Checkered Hippo was my constant companion. We fought the pillow-like henchmen of evil masterminds together.

We flew bar stool star fighters through asteroid fields to avoid pursuing Imperial star-sofas. We explored brave new worlds cleverly disguised by aliens to resemble my basement or yard all filled with wondrous, and sometimes rather dusty, creatures in them.

We saved Earth on more occasions than I care to relate. I called my first girl leaning on him, we attended school together… and he is with me still.

In their legendary 350 count silk, Vanners have immortalized my hero, if not in marble, then in high quality silk. The ties are reassurance that when we need him most, he will return and save us.

Checkered Hippo is now well passed his prime. As a matter of fact, I dare not even have him cleaned for fear I will make a ghost of him. He leeks Styrofoam pebbles from taking one too many blaster shots for me. His failing eyes replaced with special sensors designed by a great intergalactic scientist that make him better than before. And although his exploits and movements are whittled to a remnant of his former glory, truer friend hath no man.

My poor checkered Hippo as he appears today with special sensors for eyes and nostrils and with a mostly missing tongue. Decayed splendour, indeed.

Additionally, I no longer receive approving smiles from passers by when I carry him under my arm. Apparently, the world is too preoccupied to remember his many fine services. How then could I keep his memory alive without exposing him to the disintegrating rays of a public which no longer values superheroes?

Like many superheroes, one wears their badge of sincerity on their chest; bold and brave. Thus, a necktie is the proper commemoration:

A little preliminary artwork courtesy of both Michael Drake (Accessories store linked below) and the amazing design talent from the weavers at Vanners silks.

Choosing colorways from a blanket supplied by Vanners Silks. Vanners know how to treat a venerable hero like royalty.

Here he is, brilliant, bold and proud. The magnificent checkered Hippo of old. You can see being a superhero has its benefits. Now all that he and I need fear is an errant flick of salad dressing.

  1. — K-milo    Feb 9, 17:14    #

    Awesome… Heroes are something special.

  2. — gypsy    Feb 27, 22:27    #

    Lucky fellow – what a nice way to be remembered…

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